♫ :'( ♪

Why do I have to suffer so damn much? JUST WHY?! God, I always put You first in my life. You never let me down. I know that this is part of Your plan and I have to step out of my comfort zone. I did. Everything got worse. God, where are You? I need You now. I know You've told me to obey and always listen to my parents. I did. I never fight back. BUT, my dad always yell at me and it hurts. A LOT. My heart, if You look at it, its broken. I hate my dad so much. You know how I feel. I'm really sorry but I can never forgive him. I have already forgiven him MANY MANY times. I've tried tolerating with his bad attitudes but I just can't stand it anymore. It's like he never learn.

Mom,
I love you. Thank you for taking care of me when daddy dumped you. He was immature. Forgive him please. I know you already did cause you're a good mom. I know you are. You raised me up single handedly and I'm very proud of you. You thought me what's right and what's wrong. I've heard stories of single parent child. Their mom or dad neglected them and they mixed the wrong group of people. Thank God I wasn't one of them. All thanks to you, mom. Always watching me when I was kid. I'll never forget everything that you have did for me. I might have yelled at you sometimes, I'm still immature and unstable. Thank you for understanding me and always giving me advices. Though I have to admit, its kinda annoying sometimes but its good for me. So, yeah. I LOVE YOU, MOM! Always and forever.

Your beloved son,
Bryan :)

Dear friends,
Guys, you know who you are. Always there for me. Supporting me. Cheering me up. Making  fun of me. Insulting me. I'm okay with it. After all, that's what friends are for, right? I love you guys. Well, you guys are not my mom. So, no need for that long message shit thing kay :)

Here's a poem dedicated to you guys,

When I'm in pain,
You'll be there with me through the rain,
Making me laugh and calling me gay,
That's okay because that's the way.

P/S : I can't come up with anymore ideas. Mind is stuck now. Sorry.

I LOVE YOU GUYS! EACH & EVERYONE <3

♫ I HAVE A NEW BABY BROTHER ♪

The time is 10:46pm. Its the 18/11/2011. My mom just gave birth to a baby boy. Another half brother to be exact. Many of you have know that I already have 2 half sisters and they're annoying but I love the younger one because she grew up with me. I'm happy about getting a baby brother but also at the same time FUCKED UP! You know, its a very big thing for a Chinese to get a baby boy. Now, he's gonna get all the attention, my baby brother. As much as I hate my dad, I still don't want this to happen. I've tried to repair our fractured relationship, between my dad & I but it failed. It keeps getting worse actually. The things he does makes me hates him even more. Now that my half brother is born, there goes my life. I'm not saying that no one is gonna care for me anymore. I know many of you would say, he's a newborn baby, of course the adults will give him all the attention. That's not what I meant. What I meant was, my dad would definitely spend all of his time with my brother and would definitely forget about me. As you can see, I'm 17 already. He'd probably be thinking that I don't need anymore care cause I'm old enough to take care of myself.

I don't blame my brother for any of this. In fact, I'm not even blaming on anyone. Maybe I'm just thinking too much. TOO MUCH! SPM's coming to an end. What if I don't score? Will I disappoint them? I have a feeling that my younger half sister would somehow be neglected. She's only 2 and she's extremely naughty sometimes,  THANKS TO MY DAD. He taught her things that she's not suppose to learn. For example, scolding her mom. WTF RIGHT?! Total shit hole! My dad had beaten her up before by caning her and also throwing stuffs at her. There's once where my mom quickly brought my sister in the room to hide from my dad, but he bang and broke the door. I really felt like breaking his FUCKING head with a walking stick that I have at home. But there are always consequences for everything we do. I might even end up in jail. I did nothing,

Fortunately, I have a bunch of friends who are always there for me. I really love you guys. You know who you are. Not to forget that I always have my very own mom that loves me more than she loves herself. And also God, the one and only faithful Father that I'll love forever and I'm proud to have a heavenly Father like Him.

I have to baby sit now as my stepmother has to rest and take care of the newborn baby. My 2 year-old sister is now sleeping soundly on my bed because she doesn't wanna sleep in her room. My parents ain't home, that's why. She loves me too. So, yeah. That's about it.

kthxbai.